You ask a good and tough question at the end of your reply. We can never know with certainty why others act the way they do or why they react to us the way they do. It takes a good deal of wisdom and maturity to avoid immediately suspecting the worse when things don't go well when we interact with others. This is especially true for young people.
Friends of mine have wrestled with finding ways to make young female engineers feel accepted and appreciated at work. Mentoring seems to help. So does frequent and constructive feedback from bosses. That said, nothing is foolproof.
My sense is that the bias narrative loses strength when there's clear evidence that it's wrong, we have faith that bias will be addressed when it occurs, or we can see examples of people who share our "identity" but are thriving.
I appreciate you saying you try, but that really shouldn’t be necessary. In my experience there were very overtly inappropriate situations that made everyone in the room uncomfortable (and went out of their way to say so). But that is not something where 80% being normal humans erases the 20% that are just unprofessional jerks… once again though, that is not my point. Let me say it another way… for me I wanted to be seen as an engineer and all of my issues were when I was instead perceived of primarily as a young female. If I internalized that I was a female as my primary identity I would see the world through that lens and not as an engineer in an office. I was given lots of reasons to see myself in that gendered way, but I resented that expectation too much to do it. Your data on “blackness” indicates “black” is the primary identity. In identifying that way so strongly, all the bad things that happen are because of the “black” identity and not because of anything else. To me, that impedes progress. Does that make sense? If not, I should probably stop, though I do really enjoy beating metaphorical dead horses.
You ask a good and tough question at the end of your reply. We can never know with certainty why others act the way they do or why they react to us the way they do. It takes a good deal of wisdom and maturity to avoid immediately suspecting the worse when things don't go well when we interact with others. This is especially true for young people.
Friends of mine have wrestled with finding ways to make young female engineers feel accepted and appreciated at work. Mentoring seems to help. So does frequent and constructive feedback from bosses. That said, nothing is foolproof.
My sense is that the bias narrative loses strength when there's clear evidence that it's wrong, we have faith that bias will be addressed when it occurs, or we can see examples of people who share our "identity" but are thriving.
I appreciate you saying you try, but that really shouldn’t be necessary. In my experience there were very overtly inappropriate situations that made everyone in the room uncomfortable (and went out of their way to say so). But that is not something where 80% being normal humans erases the 20% that are just unprofessional jerks… once again though, that is not my point. Let me say it another way… for me I wanted to be seen as an engineer and all of my issues were when I was instead perceived of primarily as a young female. If I internalized that I was a female as my primary identity I would see the world through that lens and not as an engineer in an office. I was given lots of reasons to see myself in that gendered way, but I resented that expectation too much to do it. Your data on “blackness” indicates “black” is the primary identity. In identifying that way so strongly, all the bad things that happen are because of the “black” identity and not because of anything else. To me, that impedes progress. Does that make sense? If not, I should probably stop, though I do really enjoy beating metaphorical dead horses.
Thanks Amy. I understand your position and appreciate your feedback.